The BolehJokes Opinion: What does Najib have to do to regain the support of Chinese and Indians?

This is a trying time for our new prime minister. The results in the 3 by-elections showed a lack of trust and support for his premiership. It shows that it is the direct rejection of Barisan Nasional as a whole and not towards Tun Abdullah Badawi's leadership. At the way it is going, an immediate or may I put it as a drastic change is needed to save BN from further downfall in the next general election. So he's in a make or break situation and a wrong decision will ensure that he goes down to history as the first BN chairman to lose the Government to the opposition.

The good news for Najib is, he will be better prepared for the challenges ahead unlike his predecessor, Tun Abdullah who was in a long honeymoon period after the massive victory in 2004 election and was caught unprepared by the heavy influence of Anwar's return to politic.

So what does Najib have to do to regain the confidence and support of the Chinese and Indians?

In my opinion, he will have to make some bold moves that will probably not go down too well with people in his own party. He will have to be really brave in doing so.

1. Remove the extremists in his party (mainly UMNO Youth members). Pump in new blood into the party and change their mentality to be more open and approachable to all races. Anwar will never allow any extremist to exist in Pakatan because this is his main political agenda. To build a complete Malaysia for Malaysian with no concern for the color of the skin. No matter this is just his political gimmick or it is really his ambition, this formula has worked successfully. This is why he was favored strongly by all. He will also have to encourage the Malay politicians to garner the support of other races. Ultimately, it is better to be loved and supported by all Malaysians rather than just being loved by all Malays.

2. Form BN into one. This will be very difficult as it will mean that the Chinese, Indians, Sabahan and Sarawakians will have to give up their high post in their respective parties and take a lesser role in a united BN. Let's look at PKR. The party comprises of Malays, Chinese, Indians and other races and their success gave a big hint that Malaysians want to be united. By keeping the same format as UMNO, MCA, MIC and others will not work anymore. Going back to the old way of Mahathir's style of administration will ensure further damages. If BN is not fully rejected now, it will be fully rejected in the future.

3. In perhaps the boldest move of all, he will have to select 2 deputies from other races following the same format as Lim Guan Eng in Penang. This will definitely be a jaw-dropping move and will almost certain to return a massive gain for BN. However, he will be in a catch-22 situation as it will definitely not go down too well with Muhyiddin and other Vice-Presidents of UMNO. Infact, it will definitely not go down too well with the extremists in his party. However, this will return the confidence to all Malaysians and prove to the nation that he is really firm in his forming of 1 race and 1 nation. The Malaysian nation. Whatever agenda that the Opposition may have, will not be able to match this. But the biggest headache will be selecting 2 capable deputies. In Ong Tee Keat, he has someone who is still strongly loved and supported by certain Chinese (especially the people in Cheras and Ampang) but Samy Vellu is highly despised by not only the Indians but almost every Malaysians. So who can he select?

Time is running out soon and these are the few ways of how BN can be saved. Question remained as to whether he is brave enough to make these bold moves.

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Tri-elections: Updates and results

It's official! The 'M' factor didn't work out for BN. I feel sorry for the "Pop Star" actually. Haha.

Bukit Selambau
S Manikumar (PKR) 12,607
S Ganesan (BN) 10,232
Majority 2,375

Bukit Gantang
Mohd Jamaluddin Nizar (PAS) 21,860
Ismail Saffian (BN-Umno) 19,071
Kamarul Ramizu Idris (Ind) 62

Batang Ai
BN's Malcolm Mussem Lamoh (3,907 votes) has beaten PKR's Jawah Gerang (2,053). The majority is 1,854.

Polling at Bukit Selambau, Bukit Gantang and Batang Ai started at 8am this morning. I'm gonna do my small part of journalism. Check out for more updates.

7pm: At Bukit Selambau Unofficial results After counting four streams of out 64, PKR's S Manikumar is leading by 578 votes.

7pm: At Bukit Gantang Unofficial results PAS' Mohd Nizar Jamaluddin has increased his lead over BN-Umno's Ismail Saffian. Independent Kamarul Ramizu Idris is trailing far behind.

PAS 7,294, BN 4,670, Independent 17. Majority 2,624.

6.25pm: At Batang Ai UNOFFICIAL: BN wins Batang Ai

TCJ: Sigh..at least it's a 2-1. Was hoping for a 3-0.

6.50pm: At Batang Ai - Latest count: BN is reportedly has increased its lead over PKR to 1,000 votes.Meanwhile, at least three buses with suspected phantom voters have been stopped in Lubok Antu. They are now held at the police station with Election Commission officials and PKR’s Dominique Ng seeking to establish whether they are genuine voters.

5.25pm: At Batang Ai - More unofficial results from the on-going vote count: Gugu - BN 59, PKR 149, Krang Mong - BN 88, PKR 15. BN is still leading.

TCJ: SIGH!!!!!!

5pm: Polling has ended in Bukit Gantang, Bukit Selambau and Batang Ai.

4.45pm: At Bukit Selambau - Tension fuelled as both supporters are having a go at each other.



4.35pm: At Batang Ai - Of the five boxes opened, BN has won four polling stations - Ng Delok, Dewan Serbaguna Batang Ai, Kerangan Mong and Ulu Engkari. PKR won one in Sempang.

BN is leading with 908 votes against PKR’s 356, majority 552. About 20 percent of the votes have been counted so far.


4.20pm: At Batang Ai - Counting has begun for 14 ballot boxes. It's so far neck-to-neck between BN and PKR.

3.25pm: At Bukit Gantang - Blogger Anil Netto has put up a video clip on the teargas incident at SMK Pengkalan Aur polling centre in Air Kuning, Changkat Jering. See the video clip here.

3.24pm: At Batang Ai - Ballot boxes from 14 polling stations arrive at the main tally centre in Lubok Antu’s sport complex.

3pm: At Bukit Gantang - Tension boiled as another bus suspected of ferrying phantom voters arrived causing both supporters unrest. A PAS supporter was hit and fainted after a bottle thrown by a BN supporter hit him. Six trucks of FRU were deployed to restore calm.

2.25pm: At Batang Ai - Although polling is closed in many of the remote polling districts, the vote counting will not be done at the respective polling stations as was the case in the past.
According to the Election Commission, for reasons of logistics and weather, these ballot boxes are to be transported either by boat or helicopter to the main tally centre at the sports complex in Lubok Antu. The votes will be counted there. These boxes represent about 45 percent of the total electorate.Opposition PKR has earlier lodged an official protest because they are concerned of the possibility that these boxes could be switched while on transit. The opposition has also complained of the over-bearing presence of police even in the most remote polling districts. PKR leaders described this as an act of intimidation. According to initial unofficial exit polls, BN is trailing in a number of polling districts.

2.20pm: At Bukit Selambau - Police detained two men this morning for stopping a bus carrying BN election workers.

2.15pm: At Bukit Selambau - 2 more buses ferrying suspected phantom voters arrived. The passengers claimed to be BN supporters.


2pm: At Batang Ai - Unexpected high voters turnout. Both BN and PKR leaders have expressed confidence of winning. Political observers feel that this could end up a close fight with the results going either way.

1.47pm: At Bukit Gantang - Another bus suspected of carrying phantom voters caused disturbance.

TCJ: SACK OF WINE! Will you motherfuckers organise a clean election please. Stop cheating the "Rakyat". Damn it.

1.26pm: At Bukit Gantang - Changkat Jering state representative Mohd Osman Jailu arrived and was labelled "Katak" by PAS supporters. Osman defected from PKR to become independent which allowed BN to seize control in Perak.

12.57pm: At Bukit Gantang - There were unconfirmed report stating that the police have fired teargas at the crowd at the SMK Pengkalan Aur polling centre in Air Kuning, Changkat Jering.


TCJ: Here we go again. As the Great Syed Hamid once said - "Believe me! It's for your own protection"

12.55pm: At Batang Ai - Low voter turnout so far.

TCJ: You know what. Maybe those guys decided that if they cant get support, they might as well make it hard for people to vote. So they make it to weekdays and no public holiday. Clever tactic eh?

12.05pm: At Bukit Selambau - One bus suspected of carrying phantom voters has been stopped by opposition supporters at Gurun.



TCJ: Cant you guys be honest for once and stop cheating? God is watching this election, mind you!

12.11pm: At errr.... God knows where :) : I am taking a break. Be right back in 15 mins time. HAHA. Gotcha!

11.46am: At Batang Ai - EC has decided to transport ballot boxes for 14 out of the 26 polling stations by river and helicopters to the counting centre. Polling agents are not allowed to accompany these ballot boxes.

TCJ: MAH KEH CHAU HAI AR! What's with this? Arranging for fraud again? EC, what have you gotta hide? Why cant agents follow? Bloody fishy!

11.22am: At Bukit Selambau - FRU has been deployed at SM Aman Jaya after a stand off between BN and PKR.



TCJ: Alamak! More gangsters coming! Becareful people!

11.00 am: At Bukit Gantang - PAS candidate Mohamad Nizar's vehicle was blocked and kicked by BN supporters.



TCJ: Beware! Gangster sudah mari!


10.39 am: At Bukit Selambau - Argument broke out between PKR and BN supporters over the location of their tents outside the SJK (Tamil) Palanisamy Kumaran polling centre.

TCJ: Macam budak-budak lah these people!

10.33 am: At Bukit Gantang - PAS seemed more upbeat than their BN counterparts.

10.18 am: At Bukit Gantang - BN supporters shouted ‘Penderhaka' (traitor) to Nizar. PAS supporters reacted by shouting ‘Hancur Umno, Hidup Nizar'.

TCJ: Aiyoh! Anyone who challenge BN is a traitor? What kind of mentality is that? Ada cabaran baru ada kemajuan! Belajar lah celaka.!

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The BolehJokes Opinion: Using Go-Go girls to pull in crowd

I almost pissed myself laughing after reading this. Using go-go girls to pull in crowd. HAHAHA.

Sorry fellas for the long hiatus. I'm back!

In perhaps the cheapest political tactic ever, BN decided to use the go-go girl to grab attention in Bukit Gantang.

Come on! Are they really out of ideas? What's next?

Stand-up comedian?

Maya Karin?

Or Mat Rempit Motor Show?

Who suggested the go-go girls anyway? What a brilliant political adviser you got there mate! Hehe.

I like to laugh alot these days. So pardon me. And I just read this headline below and again couldnt stop laughing.

Why is 'suratkhabar lama' in town?

PKR VP Azmin Ali trains his guns at Mahathir during a ceramah.

"Umno has a new president, a new deputy and there is a shift in leadership. So why must they bring the 'suratkhabar lama' (old newspaper) to campaign?" he asked, drawing laughter from the audience.

HAHAHAHA. SURATKHABAR LAMA? Old newspaper?..... bloody good one, brother Azmin.

TCJ

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The BolehJokes Opinion: I dont give a flying shit. No hudud for me

You may have your reason. You may thousand of explanations. But hudud is a "no go" for me even if it is only applicable to my Malay friends. It doesn't matter. The thing is, a nation should have a standard law, a standard policy and a standard ruling. How can certain ruling only be applicable to certain race only? It doesn't work that way.

Imagine now we have hudud for Malays. Next we will have Chow Kuey Teow law for Chinese. Then Fried Meehoon law for Indians. Roti Bakar campur Teh Ais law for Kadazan, Bajau, Iban and all the orang asli.

Next, we have law for the women only. And then law for men. Then law for Manchester United fans only. Then law for Liverpool fans. And so on and so on.....

What does that tells you?........


That our nation is a fucking rojak!



no! No! no!


So once again, sorry Uncle Hadi. Rojak idea is a "no go" for me. Focus lah! Unite Pakatan into a strong unit.

TCJ

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Happy New Year Everyone. What is your new year resolution?

Hey guys,

Sorry for taking such a long break. Anyway, Happy 2009 to everyone. I wish that Bolehland will survive through the economy crisis and that our politicians will be more matured and be more caring.

It looks like Najib is going to be our next Prime Minister soon. Politics aside, I only wish that he can bring this nation forward.

Sorry Uncle Nik and Uncle Hadi. Hudud is a "no go" for me. Please. The economy is the main concern this year. Stop bickering and save us from the downfall.

With all the chaos from the opposition, I am only glad that Anwar didnt takeover now. I bet he can see clearly now that once in power, all his allies are not so united afterall. They end up biting each other. So maybe they will be better prepared for the next term but not now.

Best wishes,
TCJ

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When the joker lost his jokes

Dear friends / readers / countrymen,

I'm going through some turmoils in my life lately. I have no mood or whatsoever to write or comment about our current political situation at this moment. I saw the Yoga controversy, I just threw the newspaper away. This country is just so full of stupid politicians who are beyond help and at this moment, not worth my time debating about it.

Lately, I struggle with my career and personal life and sort of lost my way. I lost confidence in myself, I lost my love one, I lost a friend who died all of sudden, I lost my way in my work, I lost it all. I just couldn't figure out a way to get out of the situation.

I hate the way I look, I hate my weight, I hate my height, I hate my job, I hate the way my country is being run at the moment and to sum it all, I hate my life. At this point of time, I feel so alone.

Forgive me for being boring but I need a break again before I break down. I will always love RPK and support him. Please keep fighting for what's right for the people of Bolehland, Your Grace. May God bless you and the people of Bolehland.

TCJ

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The BolehJokes Opinion: Najib, the economy saviour?

Ok. I'm not a big fan of Najib but I think what he's done recently is brilliant. Most people like to jump to conclusion about many things but if you fucking use your brain for a moment and think properly, what Najib or his advisor has done is actually holding the economy.

Here are the reasons (This is only my opinion. You can agree to disagree.)

1. By raising the petrol price, the Government will earn alot of money and have alot in the reserve fund. The prices of other things will go up. Now the Government is reducing the petrol price to RM2.00, not too far away from RM1.92. The prices of other things dont drop, which means the businesses will have more profits as the cost is lesser. Same demand, more profits. Of course the people suffer alittle by spending more but ultimately it is needed to hold on to the economy.
   
   
2. With the strong reserve fund available, the Government is investing the money back into the market which will balance back the demand and supply. Remember your lesson in school? The theory of demand and supply.
   
   
3. The subsidy package of RM625. This is given to you to spend instead of keeping. The Government knows that with the money in hand, people will spend. This again stabilise the economy as businesses need demand to sustain.
   
   
4. The EPF contribution drop to 8% is another brilliant move. That means people will have more money to spend. Yes yes.... I know it's not good when you are old but for now, we need extreme measure to hold on to the economy or else we will all be dead.

The Government is trying very hard to stabilise the economy, which is not a bad thing for me. Afterall, this is their last card on the table. The BN Government has lost its reputation badly which needed no further explanation. But if they save the economy in this trying time, this will be in their propoganda in the next election and it will be really strong. I am not surprise that if they are successful, the cushion might just change and people will swing back to BN and support them. Afterall, people are usually very grateful to economy saviour. The opposition will need to work really hard to pin him down.

So can Najib save the economy, be the national hero and win you back? In my opinion, he's doing a brilliant job so far.

TCJ

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